I am the Reaper...and I'm a Six-Year-Old Girl!??!?!

so I look at my little cousin, this adorable 9-year girl who brings a smile on everyone's face... ...it has never crossed my mind that this girl could potentially drive an ax into my forehead, leaving me bleeding to death...let alone that she could very well grow up to be a man-hating dyke, much like missy elliot is rumored to be, and take on the persona of the overbearing butch who haunts the bookstore on christopher st., while doing part-time choreography for undead nurses... Or was that Michael Jackson, in his remake of Thriller? ...Hmmm, I always confuse black women. What has truly confused and intrigued me at the same time is Hollywood's over dose on young children in horror movies, preferably girls...Now I'm not sayin that we should leave our younging to their own free will, where they can don a leather clad uniform and carry around a dildo masked as a nightstick. I'm jus saying that we need to be weary of what our children are exposed to, such as egnimatic presences haunting our homes, unlabeled video tapes in black and white, and especially crazed witch hunters who are afraid of the very evil they helped create...hint...hint...the catholic church. And ladies, above all else, please practice abstinence in the face of the any man properly entitled lucifer. Your pregnancy will result in the end of the world and you will forfeit any and all insurance benefits thanks to the evil (literally, not just for baby daddies paying child support,) growing inside of you. I want to see my little cousin blossom into a beautiful nice respectful woman. If that doesn't happen, then I hope we lose all contact very soon so that when I see her in the future making out with the desperate mom who lost her child in a tragic accident, (and whose husband is oblivious and gay,) it won't be awkward. If that's what it takes to prevent her from mutitlating me into a million pieces because I can't afford an escort for her first double digit birthday, then by all means go ahead. Barbie is a lesbian anyway, remember.

(many thanks to Kellan Mansano for his collaboration in erecting this blog)